How was 2020 for you?

I don’t really like to write so much about my private life. I’ve done some surveys on the blog and on Instagram as well. The results were the same, most people voted for personal experience.

Personal experience can be many things which got me thinking about how much and what should I write. At the end I concluded that I’ll just go with the flow and see how it goes.
I might do another mistake, but it wont be the first, won’t be the last and as we’ve learned, failure is not bad all. So… 🙂

I wrote about my old machinery previously. I obviously have my own private Santa Claus, because a postman brought me a 9kg box these days with a new pc inside. My work has speed up so much, I might open another blog. Just kididng, but the change is really huge. PC might be just a tool, but you know what can you do in a kitchen with a good knife or a bad one, right?
Thanks again Matic.

I’m wondering what drives people to do good things like these for others who can’t do anything for them. At all.
But many people told me that I’m just the same. So this is obviously energy exchange, I don’t fully understand and it will have to stay this way.

I’ve also met some amazing new people since I’ve started my slovenian project.
I’m amazed about the amount of support people can give to a random stranger on the internet. And other good things many do for others. It’s really just the matter of perspective. If you focus on the good stuff, this is exactly what you’re going to see. And vice versa.

If you’re watching corona news and other bad/sad news every day, you might be in much worse mood than you have to.
The more you focus on the positive, the better your mood gets. Of course life can still suck, but it can suck a bit less.

This year has been very emotional for me. I’ve cried from sadeness many times, but also from happyness.
This is life in all of it’s beauty, right? Full of good moments, bad moments and everything in-between. It’s great to be finally able to feel all of the emotions, even though the pleasant ones last just for a brief moment. Still working on this with my therapist.

Overall 2020 wasn’t bad at all for me. I still have one more special wish though, which has nothing to do with this year or Christmas, but it’s stronger now.
I wasn’t in a stable relationship with a guy for 6 years. This connection is what I’m trully missing, I already have everything else I ever wanted from life and more.
I’m really scared when it comes to love and the thought of being attached to somebody emotionally again. This is a CPTSD struggle I’m still working on. Also, the more therapy I have, the less guys I find atractive.
This pathetic little thing is literally killing me. But I’ll survive this too, at least for a while.

How was 2020 for you – what was the best thing that happened to you? Do you have any special wishes too?

20 thoughts on “How was 2020 for you?”

  1. Do you think maybe finding less people attractive is just a result of getting older and realizing what you want and don’t want out of life and a partner? I think the more we understand about ourselves, the less we are likely to allow people into our lives who could potentially hurt us.

    Reply
  2. “But many people told me that I’m just the same.”

    You are indeed :).

    That’s such a nice story about the computer! I’m speechless, very happy for you!! It is a great example of the Karmic balance of the universe finally tipping in your favour :D.

    Reply
  3. Didn’t Anne Franck say she still believed “that people are basically good at heart”. After all she went through, she could still say that and more and more I hear about people who have had terrible experiences but are still able to carry on and have meaningful lives. You are right, it all depends what you focus on. It is not easy to do, sometimes, when you are in the depths of depression, but the fact that you are still able to rise from it….it gives one hope. I’m so glad about your gift. You certainly deserve it and I wish you much luck with all your projects.

    Reply
  4. How fun!!! Congrats on the new PC! And I just know Your someone will show up. I was alone for many years and life ended up throwing me and my sweet man together in a way I never would have thought of! Everything in its time as they say. Wishing You, Yours and THE WHOLE WORLD SOOOO Much LOVE and PEACE in 2021. Cheers and Rock On!!! 💕

    Reply
  5. The therapy is making you focus inwards, this is great and it cannot be measured by time. You are becoming stronger and know what you are willing to accept – this is great. 🧡

    Reply

Leave a Reply

%d bloggers like this: