I’m never to busy for anoter quick update. I’ve spend many years in the search of who I am, what I want, what I don’t want from life… This year I’ve finally made a progress I’ve been waiting and working on for so long.
It’s not what you might imagine. Quite the opposite probably.
Please, don’t take me for a good example, because I’m not, never will be and won’t even try anymore.
I might be a good example of who you don’t want to be or at least what you don’t want to do.
I don’t aim to live a 100% healthy life anymore. I do eat my broccoli every day and move around enough I can say I train regularly and well. I also rest enough to recover properly. I’ve finally put this into balance.
But I also do eat my chocolate every day and I started to smoke my 2-4 cigarettes per day. You can shoot me for this, but I’m not quiting until my next serious asthma attack. It’s just who I am, who I always was and I need this small amount of unhealthy stuff in my life to feel overall balanced.
I also smoke a joint or two once in a while, to get a relief from my neverending nightmares. The other days I stick to CBD and therapy which is both supervised by my shrink.
As long as I stick to this, I do way less harm to myself in many other ways. It’s how I operated for my whole life. Instead of aiming for a change that is too big for me, I’m aiming for the little things. I could have been far worse, laying in bed all day, smoking 40 cigarettes and drowning myself in alcohol (which I don’t drink at all btw).
This is good enough for me. No more aiming for perfectionism on every corner. It was too hard to stick to my strict regimes I’ve been trying to implement into my life for the last 6 years and live perfectly healthy. These have been the worst years of my life, so why stick to them, right? Something had to change and this is what I did.
This is me now and how I was the last time I saw myself happy for a longer period of time. I have absolutelly no idea what will I do tomorrow though.
If you don’t want to quit your bad habits completelly, you can at least do something to minimize the damage. It’s still better than doing nothing, but you need to be aware that what you’re doing is still bad. Yet there’s no force in this world that can stop you from doing it.
If 100% healthy lifestyle works well for you, that’s great and I’m really glad that it does for some.
We’re different and only you can define what works best for you. There is no “one fits all” solution for everyone.
What about you, who are you? How does your balance look like?